January 4, 2010


Filed under: Adoption, Birth mother — adoptation @ 8:15 pm

The lines of contact with the birth mom are open again after her end-of-year holiday. We’ve now had a couple of back-and-forths, and both my wife and I have come to the exact same conclusion: we really, really like her. And not just because of the baby thing.

Thus far, she seems like…well, like the kind of person we’d be friends with. Good friends. I suppose that’s not unusual—she did, after all, pick our profile because she felt we had something(s) in common with her. But the shape of the personality that’s starting to poke through is great. I know that my wife’s #1 fear about domestic adoption was that she wouldn’t like dealing with the birth mothers, but so far it’s a dodged bullet.

I’m curious—do a lot of people feel this way about their birth moms? And is it part of the initial flush of joy that comes with a match, or does this last? We’re already figuring out that this is the kind of dynamic that leads people to shift from semi-open towards open adoption. We went into this ready to adopt a baby, but now it seems that we’re kind of adopting another adult, too.



  1. I’m glad to read this post. You are opening my eyes to the adoption process. I hope the next week is smooth for you.

    Comment by autonomousblogger — January 6, 2010 @ 12:22 am

  2. […] Adoption, Birth mother, Infertility, Preparation, Ultrasound — adoptation @ 8:17 pm Things continue to be going smoothly with the baby’s birthmom, and my wife and I are finding we can actually turn our thoughts to […]

    Pingback by Manual Override « Adoptation — January 7, 2010 @ 8:17 pm

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