Adoptation

January 11, 2010

Baby Stuff

Filed under: Adoption, Birth mother, Infertility, Paperwork, Preparation — adoptation @ 9:01 pm

With only about 2 months to go until the baby’s birth mother is due, my wife and I are having to get serious about our preparations for the adoption. We’re now officially beyond paperwork (well, not entirely…there’s still plenty of paperwork to do!) and have to do stuff like pick out a car seat, get some baby clothes, and generally figure out how to start taking care of this baby the minute he’s put into our arms.

One thing I’m staunchly against doing is buying a lot of stuff. Not because I don’t think we’ll need or want stuff—I just know that family & friends are going to want to buy gifts and help out and such and, well, they’re certainly welcome to do so! So I’m getting a Target registry together for the baby.

But since, again, we really don’t know all that much about babies and their baby stuff, my wife thought it would be good to go to our local Target and explore the wide world of baby bedding, figure out what exactly “receiving blankets” looked like, and get a general feel for the baby-stuff scene.

And wow, did we ever have fun!

We had fun looking at stuff that we wanted our baby to have (cute, but not too cute, onesies). We had fun mocking the stuff we wanted no part of (Diaper Genie? No thanks). We had fun being horrified by some of the stuff (a gadget that lets you listen to, record, and e-mail pre-natal sounds). We had fun picking up some stuff we’d really need (car seats are not all alike). We had fun imagining this stuff in our house and the baby in our life.

But the biggest shock was realizing that we were having fun. Doing baby stuff.

That hadn’t really happened before; certainly not in a long, long time. Any baby stuff (ie, infertility stuff) we did tended to involve negative emotions that ranged from nervousness and tension to disappointment and crippling heartbreak. The rest of what we did, including for the adoption, was generally paperwork stuff. And imagining life with a baby was way, way too outside of what felt safe to think about or discuss; being in the baby aisle of Target would have just meant hours of my wife crying while I tried to comfort us both.

But there we were, showing each other funny bibs and talking about why some onesies had mittens. We were just enjoying ourselves amongst the baby stuff, and starting for the first time to get a genuine, real feeling of what it might be like to arrive at the place we’ve been trying to get to for so long.

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6 Comments »

  1. Just to let you know if you don’t already – the mittens are to cover the infants hands – newborns can have really sharp nails and they tend to scratch their faces a lot – buy a few for night time sleeping.

    Having just brought a son home a month ago, I can tell you it’s a whole lot of fun. Not much sleep, but it is fun. Having a registry will save you a lot of time and those who are parents already will know what to get you even if you don’t.

    Comment by deathstar44 — January 12, 2010 @ 1:44 am

    • Yeah, my wife straightened me out on the mittens thing…mostly, I was wondering why all of the clothes don’t have them…

      Comment by adoptation — January 12, 2010 @ 3:53 pm

  2. even if you don’t have mittens, a pair of little baby socks will do the trick 🙂

    Comment by mama2roo — January 12, 2010 @ 5:46 pm

    • Thanks! I have a feeling we’ll have no shortage of baby clothes coming our way in fairly short order…

      Comment by adoptation — January 12, 2010 @ 6:42 pm

  3. […] we would keep the diaper bin from being too terribly close to where the baby would sleep. We saw how it could be, and believed it. We even started calling it The Nursery […]

    Pingback by Opening the Closed Door « Adoptation — January 12, 2010 @ 8:38 pm

  4. […] quickly didn’t want to hear about it anymore. Their lives had too many positive plotlines and too much fun on offer to want to be dragged down with a story that has no foreseeable end […]

    Pingback by In the Mail « Adoptation — January 21, 2010 @ 7:54 pm


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